Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
why didn't you poke me back
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
