escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
