I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
