listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize