Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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