im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
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