U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
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