Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.

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  (402): Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES. http://tfl.nu/mubn
  Replies (11) Good night (1559) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  wake up i wanna do it froggy style

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  (203): wake up i wanna do it froggy style http://tfl.nu/zmqx
  Replies (18) Good night (3021) Bad night (574)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career

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  (805): In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career http://tfl.nu/rhke
  Replies (18) Good night (4556) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.

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  (805): I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals. http://tfl.nu/6f3c
  Replies (48) Good night (3580) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.

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  (513): Oh no, it isn't official until she poops. http://tfl.nu/gc75
  Replies (20) Good night (733) Bad night (3477)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on

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  (562): Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on http://tfl.nu/30zy
  Replies (38) Good night (2455) Bad night (7697)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"

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  (484): You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?" http://tfl.nu/prc0
  Replies (8) Good night (3543) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?

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  (647): Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen? http://tfl.nu/shhx
  Replies (25) Good night (2150) Bad night (2110)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.

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  (615): The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw. http://tfl.nu/u9lh
  Replies (10) Good night (724) Bad night (2767)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?

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  (814): I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls? http://tfl.nu/unf7
  Replies (8) Good night (1599) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have

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  (207): Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have http://tfl.nu/07nn
  Replies (1) Good night (809) Bad night (329)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.

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  (716): I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you. http://tfl.nu/7kt1
  Replies (7) Good night (1046) Bad night (394)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp

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  (207): Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp http://tfl.nu/ovgv
  Replies (3) Good night (690) Bad night (247)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.

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  (614): Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle. http://tfl.nu/epty
  Replies (3) Good night (1484) Bad night (266)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.

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  (904): Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown. http://tfl.nu/099k
  Replies (3) Good night (438) Bad night (178)

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