I think scott just propositioned me for sex
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
