Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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