I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
