At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
