You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
