She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
