so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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