There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
