we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
