I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
