You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
