The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
