I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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