ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
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