dude i'm inner monologue high
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
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