I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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