It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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