his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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