Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
