I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
