Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
