My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize