omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Randomize
