Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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