I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
