We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
found the other keg... it's in the tree
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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