Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
