i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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