his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
