i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
