yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
