so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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