Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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