Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Randomize
