Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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