this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
