Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
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Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
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I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
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