How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
