My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
420 ftw
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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