Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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