We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
