My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Randomize
