If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
