sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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