its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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